Waking Up With Brenda © 2018 by Brenda Miller

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Bullying Doesn't Cure Bullying

July 7, 2016

 

There is a remedy for bullying – it’s called Self-Inquiry and it ends bullying without ever speaking to the bully.

 

But first things first why would a society agree to bullying?

 

In a strange way, we’re conditioned to think ‘that’s just the way some people are’.  Worse yet, bullying or abuse of another is what we know. We all bully/abuse/be mean to someone - or a pet – in varying degrees, and we all wish we didn’t. We all wish others wouldn’t bully us and we really don’t want people we know to be bullied.

 

Wishing won’t change bullying, but awareness about it will.

 

Up until now we address bullying by:

 

-           Ignoring and Denying it. A mom I know went to the school her son attended and reported a bullying situation (repeated physical and emotional abuse) and the school said it wasn’t happening, they said they were a ‘bully-free’ school. The mom had to take her child out of school and home-school him.

 

-           Punishing them (bullying them). If someone we care about is being bullied, our own bully can rise up and want to strike out, but bullying isn’t a cure for bullying. If that worked, we’d have ended bullying by now.

 

-     Making excuses for it. A mom recently told me that she caught herself telling her daughter that when the little boy hits her, it’s just because he likes her. She was surprised to discover what she was teaching her daughter.

 

Hospitals and some other public and private organizations have signs posted that say: ABUSE WILL NOT BE TOLERATED. A sign like that in every home and hut in the world would be a good start.

 

But…the problem is deeper than that. We have to look into the depths of human consciousness to uncover the source and cure for bullying.

 

What we find in that dark and enlightening exploration is this:

 

  • We have a bully inside of us (no exceptions) and that bully picks on us and on others; and that it’s simple to get rid of it with some inner work.

  • We have past experiences that suggest that bullying and abuse are ‘normal’ and that we are powerless against it.

  • The power of sitting quietly and looking at what comes up in relation to bullying reveals insights that heal – on the spot!

 

Be someone who says no to bullying by looking inside, through a guided process: Bully Proof Yourself: www.wakingupwithbrenda.com Courses and Sessions.

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